From assume love, Patty talked about the action to tackle the feeling of being underappreciated:-
If you feel underappreciated, do less. Free yourself to be loved and appreciated for who you are instead of what you do. And when you feel good again about the relationship, do the things that make you feel loving and giving and generous and compassionate, because you are already appreciated before you do them.
Fawn from happy wives club gave a good mental reminder:-
I am reminding myself daily that all I give to my husband is just that, a gift. All I do for our household is not only for him but is also for me. I have to remember keeping a scoreless marriage means not keeping “score” of not only what my husband does wrong, but also of what I do right.
Both are meaningful messages which make me think. Recently I am confused by my desire for gold stars. So these two messages are really timely help.